When it comes to the thrilling nightmare movies that make all of us jump in our chairs, they sure are great, but at what age do they become ok for youngsters too? If your child is reaching for the chainsaw hacking monster movie at the video store should you introduce them to the gory just yet, or let it ride out a little longer?
You are your child’s monitor to the outside world. You see their development and you know their limits. Some children actually do mature quicker and more naturally than others and only you can know this, and notice this with enough clarity to determine their ability to handle the unknown.
The age-appropriateness of movies is changing but the ratings are your indicators. Begin by looking up the theatrical trailers of movies online. Using your child sensors you can tell by the previews whether this movie is something that your child can handle as being ‘just a movie’ or see it something that will cause them nightmares for a month.
Abrupt and loud noises gore, and intense danger can be startling for even older kids. Generally, children younger than seven can’t distinguish between fantasy and reality even if they are told so. Children that are older, or those that have matured faster than normal, can endure creatures and concepts that younger children still believe to be real. If the boogey-man still hides under your child’s bed it is fairly safe to say the time has yet to come.
If your child insists that they are old enough for a scary movie, but you disagree, work together on a compromise. If you are aware of a film that is comprised mostly of suspenseful actions such as loud noises, creepy features (such as shadows), and music that can lead anyone to suspect something is about to happen (but not), then give it a try. Like a test. If your child is upset or alarmed by the mere implication of scary-concepts (without any actual gore or horror) then it may not be the best time to introduce scary movies. By using this little test you can be certain that you are making the right choice and being rational about the situation. Being a parent can be confusing but knowing your child will help you to make the best decisions possible.
The good old days when Mom’s worked at home. Their only work was being a Mother, keeping up the house, and having dinner ready when Dad returned home from a long day at the office. Well, not anymore. This style of home life is a dying breed. It is not due to a lack of wanting though. There are many unconventional themes brewing these days, and from what some families have to say about the newly devised arrangements, it seems to be working pretty well.
Stay at home dads are the newest statement in at-home arrangements. This is the newest trend in today’s unbiased work-force influenced home life. When it comes to the pay rate of the average business there is as little bias between men and women as there is in the gender-concept of at home parenting.
Most women are making, on average, the same if not more in the work place than their husband counter parts. Women receive the same benefits such as health/dental/vision care, 401K’s, life insurance coverage, and FSA’s and all of this comes with, and without, a comprehensive college degree to back them up. The bias of men working better, harder, faster, and stronger in the work place has died down to the truth that women can anything men can do and they can do it with pride just as a man can.
With the wage increases for women, the openings ranging in such a broad spectrum, and the developments becoming more and more complex everyday for women workers, there seems no end to this integrated trend. With all of these involved factors there seems no other alternative but to begin the reversal of roles in the home.
The economy has played a big hand in the skyrocketing trend reverses over the past few years. With massive lay offs, plant closings, bank downsizings, and so much more devastation to the American workforce it seems a natural idea to place the man in the home to reduce the costs of child care for the family. By setting an equal example for your children this actually creates a more stable and comfortable home environment for the kids too. It is not only acceptable for men to be homemaker’s in today’s society, but it is becoming more and more economical for a parent to be in the home. Child care is one of the major expenses for families and with the extra set of hands to care for the children more families can begin saving money where before there was none.
Nanny’s are great. They are a fun, caring person who comes in and helps you to care for your kids all the while helping to control the family chaos. Some of us have actually learned a thing or two from nanny’s and seeing their simplistic eagerness and subtle control makes some of us wish we had that subtle power with our kids.
What makes the nanny so easy for the kids to get along with anyways? It is the friend-like way they make their approach. They are the kids friends but they still the one in control. Remaining firm on the Do-Not’s and being chipper and approving with the Do’s a nanny is incredibly confident and easy to get along with.
So how can parents get along with their children like a good nanny does naturally? Underneath all of the stress and daily build-up of parenting you are still the fun-loving, respectful, and accepting parent your kids need. Devise a plan to turn your usual push-over attitude into a strong-willed, yet gentle and caring resonance.
It is just as easy to be your child’s best friend as it is to be their parent. Unlike best friends, you will still carry the strength-through-love to keep things orderly and understanding. Begin with something little, like clearing the air and resolving little issues before they turn into bigger problems. If you see your child doing something that aggravates, and is possibly unsafe (such as throwing things), and you do not fix this right away it will very soon become a much bigger and much more difficult situation.
With open conversation and honesty these subtle situations can be resolved before any real conflict is ever created. By being sure to trust yourself and follow your instincts you can learn to develop certain attitudes that abound in love and trust. Being open with your family is the key to true communication and powerful togetherness.
The time will come for every family when the need for child care will arise. This can go one of two ways; smoothly, almost fun or terrifying for both the parent and then the child. This is because of the saying that the anxious parent causes anxiety in the child. This certainly rings true for a lot of Mother’s and young toddlers. We’ve all seen the poor child screaming as his Mother walks reluctantly away, backwards, from the child care facility. The backwards walk indicates the Mothers anxiety in leaving the child and the child senses this reluctance and screams to show it.
The parents need to do the proper amount of investigation into facilities before deciding to sign-up. If either parent is reluctant then it may be a good idea to reconsider a different facility. Sometimes the Mother is genuinely attached and feels a sense of separation anxiety themselves. If you want your child to have the easiest transition possible you may want to consult therapist or try to deal with these strong emotions on your own before sharing the traumatic emotions with them on the day of arrival. Show your love for your baby by caring for yourself too.
Children six months and younger do not usually have such a traumatic experience when being introduced to a new environment. This is the best time to bring the issue up for discussion. If your child is old enough to discuss it with you begin to make it a fun topic by drawing pictures to explain it or telling fun stories about activities they will do. Create a ‘goodbye’ ritual all your own.
You will want to consider taking your child to the facility to see the building, meet the other adults, look at the playground, and just get a general ‘feel’ for the place before the starting date. By doing this is reduces the shock of not knowing what to expect. Give your child a specific item from home that they are allowed to take with them to give them a secure feeling. A small toy, picture in a silly frame, or a trinket you won them from the fair. They may want something to ground them to home even from the distance.
And most importantly, forget everything else as long as you remember this; do not disappear on your child. This is the most frightening experience imaginable on a child’s first day away from home and family. If you allow them proper time to become acquainted to the idea then will be no need to convey tricks to ‘get away’. Take them to see the facility, keep your own spirits high, and smile for their sake.