Family and Parenting: Information For Families

This article is for all the teens about to go to prom.

There is a troubling trend at today’s proms. The trouble usually doesn’t begin until after the prom ends. This is when some of the after-party dilemmas will begin to take ahold of the young attendants. These problems do not always pick and choose who they will grab ahold of. These issues do not give too many warning signs.

The issues here can be related to respect, safety, and making the right decisions about your life and safety. When it comes to what happens after the prom, it is up to you to take ahold of your life and the choices you make within it.

If you feel that your safety is at risk then you have the choice to make the smart moves. If someone is questioning the respect that you have for yourself and your body it will be up to you to act. When it comes to staying safe, and you are put in a questionable position, it will put your mind and body into a fight or flight response period. This is when you chose to act or fold.

When you are put into an uncomfortable position or put into a place where you feel you should not be, you will have the choice to say something or to shut down and accept what is happening. You will need to decide for yourself, as a teen, what you can do to protect your body and mind if you are ever caught in a situation of danger.

It will be up to you to make your own decisions including your safety and your integrity.

It may not be any every day occurrence, but peer pressure is a steady issue among children and teens. Some pressure is silly badgering, while some is endangering behavior that can risk your child’s safety. If your child is taught a few simple rules at an early age they are more likely to react better to certain situations when peer pressure is involved.

Peer pressure can also work in the opposite way. By resisting negative peer pressure it is possible to instill positive peer pressure values in children. It is possible for your children’s friends to influence them in positive ways.

Understand that the stronger the relationship you have with your child, the less likely they are to follow any bad examples that they may be exposed to. Your children will react better to certain situations if they are taught how to handle these situations appropriately. Teach your children to ask them selves questions when they are approached with situations where they are unsure. Questions like : Is this wrong? Is it illegal? Am I afraid they will laugh at me? Why do they want me to do this? Why am I tempted to go along?

When a child has solid core values instilled in their belief systems they have a more profound reasoning with right and wrong. When taught these virtues of right and wrong children learn to decide for themselves whether something is right or wrong. Try an activity where you present the child with examples of situations that they may be facing and hear and evaluate their response. Explore with them what would happen if they responded in certain ways. They will get a feeling of consequences, right and wrong, and this game may open your eyes as well.

Some children may feel trapped by a tense situation and be pressured into it by shear unknowing fear. Encourage them to avoid giving an immediate answer of YES or NO when friends want them to do something questionable. This can allow them come bought time to make a decision. Let them even use you as an excuse to get away from the situation, such as “I will be grounded forever if I do that!”

Try having your child practice the following steps to resist peer pressure: Have them look at the person, Using a calm voice to answer, they should state clearly that they do not want to engage in that activity, they can suggest another activity and offer a reason, stay persistent and say “No” with every come-back, and finally, teach them to leave or ask the other person to leave if it persists.

Just a few simple steps and a child’s day can be that much safer while at school or even while just being with friends.

A child’s emotional quotient (EQ) is very important for his or her success. A high EQ means that a child relates and communicates comfortably with people, copes adequately with emotions, and forms lasting friendships. Parents greatly contribute to the development of the emotional intelligence of their kids. Teaching cooperation, empathy, and responsibility are very critical. It is also important to let kids allow kids to understand and deal with their feelings as they arise.

In order to help the development of emotional intelligence in your child, you need to take certain steps. First, get to know your child and accept her or him. This is hard for some parents who want their kids to be the best in certain arenas and cannot accept the fact that their kids are not perfect. Find out how your child reacts in certain situations. Determine what your child enjoys and excels in, as well as what your child struggles with and does not enjoy. Notice how your child deals with anger and frustration. Further, take note of how your child interacts with peers, teachers, and other people.

Your child will get into negative situations. As a parent, you might want to protect him or her. As much as you may want to protect your child, you must allow him or her to experience negative situations. This is how a child learns to deal with anger, frustration, and other negative feelings. Never feed a child or buy him or her toys to stop the crying and tantrums. This will only inhibit growth and prevent the process of learning through experience.

It is also your responsibility to broaden your child’s emotional vocabulary. Children usually use the words “mad” or “sad” to describe their emotions. They lack the vocabulary that is necessary to describe a specific emotion. They may feel disappointed or but just not know how to express it. Parents can help children use words that are more specific by using them in their own vocabulary. Children learn by example. Use the words and encourage your child to do so, as well. Further, if your child is having an outburst, ask him or her about the emotions that are going on. Ask how you can help and what would make the circumstance better. Show that you are a caring person who wants to understand. Whenever your child handles a struggle in a positive manner, praise him or her. Also, remind your child to use the tactic again when necessary.

Children are not born with social skills. It is a parent’s responsibility to teach their kids how to behave and respect others. An emotional intelligent child knows to say “I’m sorry” when necessary. Parents could help their children be respectful by encouraging them to consider what other people might think about a situation. A good way to practice this would be to ask your child to describe how characters in a film or book might feel. Then, ask your child if he or she has ever felt that way.

During adolescence, children begin to spend a lot of time with their friends. They spend increasingly less time with their family. This makes the kids more susceptible to the influences of peer pressure. While this type of pressure can be dangerous, it is also important to keep in mind that teenage friends can have a positive influence on your children, as well. Therefore, you should help your kids find friends with similar and safe interests and views. Friends should focus on academics, and refrain from using drugs, smoking, and drinking alcohol.

Adolescence is a stage of life that involves risk-taking behaviors. Children try to find their own identity and become more independent from their parents. Thus, they gravitate toward their friends. With the increase in independence comes vulnerability to potentially risky behavior. Children are more prone to experimenting with drugs and drinking, especially if there is peer pressure taking them in that direction. Children who use drugs are also more prone to practicing unprotected sex early in life. Further, they have different types of problems in school and with their behavior. They also have low self-esteem that may carry on to adulthood.

It is a parent’s duty to have open communication with a child. Your child needs to feel safe with you. The open dialogue can help minimize a child’s vulnerability to negative influences and prevent him or her from picking up bad habits and behavior problems. Adolescents whose parents talk to them on a regular basis are at much less risk for experimenting with alcohol, cigarettes, and drugs. You need to teach your child how to avoid situations that involve drug use, drinking, or smoking. You also need to guide them choose friends who do not use these substances. Most parents are not aware of the role they can play in their child’s life. Open communication is very important.

You also need to help your child develop self-esteem. This will help ward off negative peer pressure. To do so, you need to show your child love. Confidence and self-worth develop when a child feels loved by family and friends. Listen to your child and validate his or her feelings. Allow him or her to voice opinions even if you disagree. Remember that you are trying to build confidence.

Some of the peer pressure that adolescent kids are exposed to deal with external or material things, like clothing, hair, music, and so forth. While some parents insist on their own ways of thinking, it is not always important as long as the child is decent, safe, and does well in school. It is worthwhile to ignore some issues that are not very critical. Allow your child to find his or her own identity. Power struggles over unimportant issues may cause more problems and a bigger divide between parent and child. A parent also need to be aware of other negative influences. It is not only about peers. The Internet, video games, television, and movies can play a negative role on a child.